The Church of the Psychedelic Tuba

Q:  Is The Church of the Psychedelic Tuba real?

A:  Yes.  We are on the internet so we must be real.

 

Q:  Do I need to believe in G*d to be part of the church?

A:  You need to believe the word exists.  Since all thoughts are things if you can think of G*d then your thought has created G*d.  

 

Q:  Seriously I am an atheist can I join your church?

A:  Why would an atheist want to join a church?

 

Q:  You can't answer a question with a question.

A:   Sorry I can't answer your question because is a statement.

 

Q:  Do I need to own a tuba to attend your services?

A:  No.  One not need to possess a tuba to experience the peace profound.  There are communal tubas available for sharing.  On Really High Holidaze we suggest you try to bring your own horn to toot.

 

Q:  Does the church have sacrements?

A:  We are strictly BYOS (Bring Your Own Sacrements) however we do encourage sharing.

 

Q:  I am Hindu/Muslim/Jewish/Christian/Buddhist/Pagen/Rastafarian may I attend your services?

A:  Yes please.  BYOG (Bring your own G*d) The tuba church amplifies whatever prayers or thoughts you intone.  Whatever the G*d of your heart is amplify it.  We only ask that you keep your other religions to yourself while in the presence of the sacred holy tuba.  

 

Q:  Why do you spell G*d as G*d?

A:  To appear spiritually superior.